Q&A: Best vibrator to buy for my wife?

Dear Sh!

I'd be very grateful for some advice about the best vibrator to buy for my wife. I have been looking at your website, and many others, and I'm afraid I am bewildered by the variety of bits and pieces on offer. So, any guidance would be most gratefully received.

Basically, my wife has trouble relaxing and achieving orgasms regularly with me. She can, and does, achieve them but quite rarely, and only when she is very relaxed and not thinking about the kids, the house etc. Now, as a rule, she does not masturbate and has told me that she has never brought herself to orgasm on her own. But I know that she can get off when stimulated properly, and so I am keen to help her achieve it as often as possible. She is keen on that too, and is interested in trying anything that will help!

I did buy her a Rabbit Vibe four or five years ago, but she never got on (or 'off') with it and it has since gone by the wayside. When she does get off with me it is generally by grinding herself down on my pubic bone when I am inside her, so stimulating her clitoris seems to work (although if I rub her in that area it seems to have little effect).

Some of the vibrators I have read about are not like a penis at all and there was also one called 'Je Joue.' I think one of these 'non-penis' type ones might suit her best. Thanks!

Hi there,

You’ve come to the right place for a ‘non-penis’ type toy as we don’t stock them. Instead, we have beautiful, body-friendly sex toys, and we have a few options in mind for your wife.

Best vibrator for clitoral pleasure

There is indeed an excellent toy by British sex toy designer Je Joue, Mimi.

Mimi is a pebble-shaped vibe that sits discreetly and comfortably in the palm of the hand. Mimi offers 10 pleasure modes, so there are lots of thrills to explore.

As Mimi is made from seamless, soft silicone, your wife can grind against it as hard as she likes without having any ‘ouch’ moments.

Making time for masturbation

Masturbation is certainly something we would urge your wife to make time for.

Over 70% of women find it tricky or even impossible to get off during penetrative sex alone, so your wife is by no means alone. It’s common for women to find it hard to switch off, especially if they have young children. If you buy her a beautiful vibrator gift, could we suggest you take the kids out for the day? This ensures she can have a leisurely, interruption-free introduction to her new toy...

Women often worry that they are taking "too long" to orgasm. This worry puts the kibosh on an orgasm, making it even more elusive. The only way to break this circle is to allow oneself the time it takes. Lots more practice, both alone and with you, will help.

Couples vibrators

Couples vibrators have been designed for use during sex. They provide exciting thrills during intercourse, and many women rely on the additional buzz to get off. We have two recommendations, both equally popular with our customers.

Remote control toys are especially great for couples, and the iJoy Remote Egg vibrator is a bestseller. Your wife can hold the egg shape and stroke it over her vulva and clitoris in all the ways she likes best. You get to watch her pleasure herself and control the thrills by holding the remote... Fun!

We-Vibe Unite is an innovative couples vibrator that offers G-spot and clitoral stimulation during penetrative sex. A C-shaped sex toy like this one is “worn” by the woman during intercourse but still leaves enough space for a partner’s penis to fit inside.