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SH! Masturbation Advice

Masturbation Tips From The Sexperts At Sh!

Celebrate National Orgasm Day with one of life's best feelings - a toe-curling orgasm to take your breath away! The 31st of July is dedicated to the sexual climax, but it also shines a bright light on the orgasm gap. The orgasm gap is the difference in sexual satisfaction between hetero men and women, specifically, the unequal frequency of orgasms during partnered sex. The myth that women need vaginal penetration to climax is the problem. 95% of men orgasm through intercourse, but only around 20% of women are able to orgasm, solely through peneration.

But the orgasm gap isn't just about differences between women and men reaching the firework stage. The shocking fact is that 10-15% of women have never orgasmed, and around 50% are not satisfied with how often they get there...

On the bright-side, with the right stimulation 70% of women can be multi-orgasmic, and those who have discovered what works for them can often experience 4 -5 big O's per session.

Self love is key to discovering what works for you, because (to para-phase Rupaul) 'if you don't love (know) yourself, how the hell anyone else gonna love (know) you!

Our recent masturbation survey showed that almost 20% of the participants don't know how to pleasure themselves or feel too embarrassed to try. This isn't news to us - it's something that we've known for a long, long time. With this unnecessary pleasure gap in mind (let's face it, men & penis-owners generally own their self-pleasure), we created a female orgasm workshop that teaches women how to masturbate. The Becoming Orgasmic course takes you from arousal and desire, via sexual fantasies and anatomy, to techniques for solo play.

Our tips for masturbation (and how you can reach orgasm)

Our best masturbation tip is to do it. It's as simple as that! Masturbation can be a super-sexy shared activity, but it's often easier to try solo if you are new to it. We tend to censor ourselves if we're feeling shy, so scheduling some alone time is helpful. Lock the door, turn up the music and let your mind slip into a fantasy about your hot partner/neighbour/favourite actor. Allow your fingers to slide beneath the panty elastic and treat yourself to a shame-free fondle. 

Our second best tip is to not treat it as a goal-focused exercise. If you haven't yet experienced orgasm, we understand you want to find out what all the fuss is about. But, if your brain is too focused on the goal, your body won't enjoy the journey, and you'll clit-block yourself. Set your clit free by letting your hand have a life of its own. Don't judge it - if your curious fingers want to slip-slide around soft folds or dip inside the vaginal opening, just go along with it!

If you are struggling to reach the Big O through acoustic methods, it may be worth trying electric. We stock a range of vibrators for beginners up to seasoned sex toy experts. Start with something small, like the Mini Pink Vibe, which can be used for both clitoral play and internal orgasms. There are no rules on how to use it, just play around and keep doing what you like.

If masturbation makes you feel embarrassed, it might feel more comfortable to try it under the covers with the lights off. If you're the romantic type, light some candles and pour yourself a nice glass of wine. If you want to go all-in, leave the lights on and position yourself in front of a mirror. There are no rules. The only thing that matters is that you feel relaxed, aroused and ready to explore. Chase your own pleasure in all the ways that feel great for you!

WoC masturbation in shower

Shop toys to help you achieve an orgasm

Sex toys are designed to help bring on arousal and orgasm. Finding a toy that works for you can take some trial and error, but once you find your favourite - it'll help blow your socks off! Toys are very personal, but we have a few favourites that always help boost us over the finishing line.

Suction toys are magnificent and the type of toy we reach for when we want a quick fix. Suction and air pressure toys are incredibly reliable, and the Rose make us weak at the knees. Super-cute, efficient and at a reasonable price point, Rose gets 5 stars from us!

Ana is a super-flexible G-spot vibe with 10 exciting modes to explore. The flat tip is perfect for exploring the G-spot, the erogenous zone located on the front wall of the vagina. Ana is perfect if you're new to internal toys. It's so soft and bendy, which ensures comfortable insertion and play.

For a hands-free, drawn-out pleasure session with a fantastic ending, this dual stimulation suction vibe is our go-to. This beautiful "sucker" delivers powerful dual stimulation through a fulfilling internal shaft and strong suction for clitoral stimulation. 

We're also huge fans of enhancing gels. These products work their magic by increasing blood flow to juicy bits, which is really helpful when you get oh-so-close but still don't quite make it.

More tips & tricks for fun masturbation here!

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