Spanking Toys Spankers • Paddles • Whips • Feathers

There’s a whole heap of reasons why 60-70% of people find spanking a turn-on. The bottom is packed with nerve endings and is an erogenous zone in its own right, so spanking can create delicious sensations while also stimulating areas close to the genitals.

Spanking can also release built-up tension, trigger feel-good endorphins, and add anticipation, playfulness and power dynamics to sex. For some people, the role-play element is every bit as exciting as the physical sensation.

In short: bottoms are wonderfully responsive things.

Start gently and build intensity gradually. Check in regularly and stop whenever the receiver wants.

Stick to fleshy, well-padded areas such as the buttocks and upper thighs, and avoid the spine, lower back/kidney area, joints and other bony or vulnerable areas.

If you're using a new paddle, crop or flogger, practise on a cushion and test it on yourself first so you understand how it feels.

New to impact play? Our How to Spank Safely guide covers safe spanking areas, technique and different spanking toys in more detail.

A broad spanking paddle is a great place to start. Its larger surface spreads the impact across a wider area, making it easier to control and generally less concentrated than a narrow crop or cane.

Start with light taps, take your time and let the person receiving guide how much intensity feels right.

They can feel surprisingly different.

Paddles have a broad surface that spreads sensation across the skin. Crops have a smaller striking area, creating a more focused sensation. Floggers have multiple tails that spread the sensation over a wider area, with the feel depending on their material, weight and design.

Whichever you choose, start lightly — you can always build from there.

It can — but how spanking feels depends on the toy, technique, intensity and the person receiving it. Sensations can range from a gentle warming tap to something sharper or more intense.

Pain shouldn't be something anyone simply has to tolerate. Check in, build gradually and stop or change what you're doing whenever the receiver wants.

Talk about it before you start playing, rather than introducing spanking as a surprise.

Bring up your spanking fantasy when you’re both comfortable and relaxed, preferably outside the bedroom so there’s no pressure to make a decision in the moment.

Sharing fantasies can feel vulnerable, so try confiding something about yourself first. For example: “I’d love you to spank me” or “I’d love to spank you. Just thinking about it really turns me on. Is that something you’d like to try sometime?”

If they say no, respect the answer and don’t push. They may want to think about it and revisit the conversation themselves later - or spanking simply might not be their thing. Either is absolutely fine.

If they respond positively, discuss what you'd both like to try, what’s off-limits and how you'll communicate during play.

Consent is an ongoing conversation, so anyone can change their mind at any point.

A safeword can make communication especially clear during spanking and other forms of impact play.

The traffic-light system is wonderfully simple: green means everything feels good, amber means slow down or check in, and red means stop.

Whatever system you choose, agree on it beforehand — and a request to stop should always mean stop.

Aftercare is the kinky version of pillow talk — a chance to check in with each other as you both come down from the hormonal rush of play.

Aftercare after spanking might mean kissing, cuddling, gently rubbing or soothing tender areas, having a drink or eating something nice together. Some people want lots of closeness; others prefer a little space.

Ask rather than assume - the best aftercare is whatever feels good for both of you.