Buying your first strap-on doesn't have to feel overwhelming. Explore beginner-friendly harnesses, body-safe dildos and complete kits chosen to make getting started simple. Whether you're buying for yourself or with a partner, we'll help you find a comfortable, confidence-boosting first setup.
Explore beginner-friendly harnesses, body-safe dildos and complete kits chosen to make getting started simple.
Explore the Collection
Shop beginner-friendly strap-ons, harnesses and starter kits, or use the filters to find your perfect first setup.
Quick Guide
Learn how to choose your first strap-on, find the right dildo and harness, and get started comfortably and confidently.
A few simple extras can make your first strap-on experience much more comfortable.
One of the biggest mistakes first-time buyers make is choosing a dildo that's too large. A comfortable first experience builds confidence.
A secure, well-fitting harness makes your first experience far more enjoyable and helps your dildo stay comfortably in place.
Not sure what goes with what? A beginner strap-on kit takes the guesswork out of buying your first strap-on.
We recommend choosing a separate harness and dildo - or a currated kit - rather than an all-in-one (fused-together) strap-on.
Your first time doesn't have to be perfect. Take your time, communicate and enjoy discovering what feels good together.
Your first strap-on is a big moment. We've been helping people get it right for over 30 years.
"My first ever harness, I have since experimented with others but not found one as secure and comfortable as this."Leather 2-Strap Harness
"The dildo is great for a beginner as it is a reasonable size without being intimidating. My girlfriend and I both love this kit."Best Strap-On Kit
"We got for our first foray into strap-on sex and we have never looked back.”Cupid 2 Curved Dildo
WHY CHOOSE SH!
Everything you need for a great first strap-on experience, from beginner-friendly harnesses and handmade dildos to expert advice when you need it.
Carefully curated to make choosing your first strap-on simple.
Adjustable harnesses and easy-to-wear styles for confident play.
Body-safe UK-made dildos, with small and slim sizes for beginners.
Trusted, personal advice to help you choose what works for you.
Choosing your first strap-on can feel like a big decision. We've been designing and recommending strap-ons for over 30 years and are always happy to help you find the right setup for your body, experience and the way you want to play.
Ask Us AnythingGOOD TO KNOW
What beginners ask about their first strap-on.
The best first strap-on is one that feels comfortable, secure and confidence-building.
For most beginners, we recommend starting with a slim, body-safe silicone dildo, an adjustable harness and a good-quality water-based lubricant.
Our beginner strap-on kits take the guesswork out by pairing products that work well together, but if you'd rather build your own, we're always happy to help you choose the best combo for you.
If you're completely new to strap-on play, a beginner strap-on kit is the easiest place to start. Each kit includes a carefully matched harness, body-safe silicone dildo, water-based lubricant and toy cleaner, so you can feel confident that everything works well together. Plus, our kits save you 10% or more compared with buying the items separately.
If you'd prefer to choose each piece yourself, building your own setup gives you more flexibility. You can select the harness, dildo and accessories that best suit your body, preferences and the way you want to play.
Whichever option you choose, we're always happy to help you find the right combination.
We recommend adding a few essentials to help your first adventure go smoothly.
We recommend adding a few essentials to help your first adventure go smoothly.
A good-quality water-based lubricant is a must. Unlike using your fingers, you can't always tell how wet your partner is through a strap-on, so adding lubricant helps everything glide along nicely and keeps play comfortable from the very beginning.
Toy cleaner makes cleaning quick and easy after play, helping keep your dildo hygienic and ready for next time.
If you're building your own setup, don't forget to check that your harness and dildo are compatible.
Or, if you'd rather keep things simple, our beginner strap-on kits include a matching harness, body-safe silicone dildo, water-based lubricant and toy cleaner - everything you need to get started while saving 10% or more compared with buying everything separately.
While all-in-one strap-ons may seem like a cheaper, simpler option, we don't believe they're the best choice for most people - especially beginners.
Unlike a separate harness and dildo, all-in-one strap-ons can't be customised. You're limited to a single dildo size and shape, and if you want something different in the future, you'll usually need to replace the whole strap-on.
They're also often more difficult to clean thoroughly, particularly where the dildo joins the harness, and many use stretchy elastic harnesses that can feel less secure and comfortable.
We recommend choosing a separate harness and body-safe silicone dildo instead. You'll get a better fit, better quality, and the flexibility to swap dildos as your confidence and preferences grow—all while keeping the same harness.
Everyone is different, but most people feel much more confident after just one or two sessions. Wearing a strap-on uses different muscles and movements than you're used to, so it's perfectly normal for it to feel a little unfamiliar at first.
Start with a comfortable, well-fitting harness and a slim dildo, take your time, and don't worry about getting everything perfect.
Many first-time wearers find it helps to practise moving, walking and thrusting while dressed before using their strap-on with a partner.
Remember, confidence comes with practice. Relax, communicate, and don't be surprised if you both end up laughing a little along the way—that's all part of the fun.
We don't usually recommend strapless strap-ons as a first choice strap-on.
Because they're designed to stay in place using an internal bulb rather than a harness, they often require more pelvic floor strength, coordination and practice to use comfortably.
For most beginners, a harness and dildo offer a more secure, stable and confidence-building experience. Once you've become comfortable wearing a harness, many people enjoy exploring strapless designs as something different.
If you're curious, you can explore our strapless strap-ons here. They're a fantastic option once you've gained a little more confidence and experience.
Yes. Unopened dildos can be returned for an exchange or store credit, provided they're still sealed in their original packaging, in accordance with our Returns Policy.
If you're unsure about harness sizing, try your harness on over your underwear first. If the fit isn't quite right, you can return it for an exchange or store credit, as long as it hasn't been worn next to bare skin and is returned in a resaleable condition.
If you're unsure what to choose before ordering, we'd much rather help you get it right first time. With over 30 years of experience advising first-time buyers, we're always happy to recommend the best sizes of dildo and harness for you.
Absolutely. Every order leaves us in plain, unbranded packaging with nothing to spoil the surprise.
Your privacy is paramount to us, so there's nothing on the outside to reveal what's inside. We've been packing strap-ons with care - and complete discretion - for over 30 years, so you can shop with confidence from the moment you order.
Place your order before 3pm (Monday–Friday) and we'll dispatch it the same day. Standard UK delivery usually takes 2–4 working days, and UK delivery is free on orders over £60.
Can't wait? We don't blame you. Guaranteed Next Day Delivery is available at checkout.
