Buying your first dildo can be exciting — and slightly bewildering. Slim or ample? Soft silicone or satisfyingly solid glass? Strap-on, strapless, double-ended... where do you even start?

The easiest way is to forget what you think a dildo should look like and start with your body, the sensations you enjoy and how you want to play.

Ask yourself:

• Is it for solo pleasure, partner play or both?
• What width and length feel appealing?
• Do you want something soft and flexible or firm and weighty?
• Are you interested in G-spot or anal stimulation?
• Will you use it by hand or with a strap-on harness?
• Would you like vibration?
• Are you looking for something you can enjoy simultaneously with a partner?

There isn't one perfect dildo for everyone. The fun bit is finding what works for you.

Choosing the Right Size Dildo

For penetrative toys, width usually matters more than length. You can control how deeply you insert a longer dildo, whereas too much girth can quickly turn pleasure into discomfort.

If you're unsure of your preferred size, starting slimmer can feel less intimidating. If you already know you enjoy a fuller sensation, there's no reason you need to start small.

At Sh!, we make choosing easier with three broad size families:

Slim → A gentler width for beginners or anyone who simply prefers a slimmer feel.
Mid → More presence and fullness without going too large.
Ample → For those who know they enjoy a fuller, stretchier sensation.

Pay attention to insertable length and diameter, rather than the overall dimensions of the toy.

If you're planning to use your dildo in a strap-on harness, remember that some usable length will be lost where the dildo sits against the harness and body.

Sh! tip: Size is preference, not progression. There's absolutely no requirement to "work your way up".

Silicone, Glass or Metal Dildo?

Size isn't the only thing that changes how a dildo feels. Material and firmness can make just as much difference.

Silicone Dildos

Silicone is smooth, sensual and wonderfully versatile. Depending on the design, it can offer anything from soft flexibility to satisfyingly firm pressure.

Our Sh! silicone dildos come in an enormous variety of sizes, curves and textures, making them a brilliant choice for first-time and experienced dildo lovers alike.

Choose silicone if → you want some softness and give during penetration.

Glass Dildos

Glass dildos are completely firm, ultra-smooth and weightier than silicone. That rigidity means even a relatively slim glass dildo can deliver very focused pressure.

They're particularly lovely if you enjoy precise G-spot stimulation, and they can be gently warmed or cooled for temperature play.

Choose glass if → you enjoy smooth, firm, focused sensations.

Metal Dildos

Metal offers the same uncompromising firmness with even more satisfying weight.

The combination of weight and rigidity can create wonderfully deep, concentrated pressure, while the smooth surface glides beautifully with lube. Metal is also fabulous for temperature play.

Choose metal if → weight, firmness and deep pressure are part of the appeal.

Sh! tip: Don't compare size alone. A rigid glass or metal dildo can feel more intense than a similarly sized silicone dildo.

What Shape Should My First Dildo Be?

Think about what already feels good.

A straighter dildo is great for classic penetrative sensations, while a curved G-spot dildo directs pressure towards the front vaginal wall.

Texture matters too. Ridges, ripples and twists create extra sensation as the dildo moves, while a smooth design gives you a simpler glide.

If you know that deep penetration can feel uncomfortable, look for a comfortable length and a rounded or curved shape that gives you more control.

Your first dildo doesn't have to do everything. Sometimes simple is exactly what you want.

Want Your Dildo to Vibrate?

A dildo's main job is penetration, but that doesn't mean it can't buzz too.

A vibrating dildo combines fullness, movement and pressure with vibration. It's worth considering if you already know you enjoy vibration or simply want the option to experiment with another sensation.

Prefer penetration without buzzing? Stick with a non-vibrating dildo. Neither is "better" — they're simply different experiences.

Choosing a Dildo for a Strap-On

Planning to wear your dildo in a harness? Look for a strap-on compatible dildo with a suitable flared base.

A classic strap-on harness holds the dildo securely against the body, giving the wearer plenty of control over movement. Interchangeable dildos also mean you can swap sizes and shapes without changing your harness.

Check the size of your harness's O-ring against the dildo before buying, and remember to allow for some usable dildo length being lost once it's fitted into the harness.

New to strap-ons? → A harness with a separate dildo is usually the easiest and most adaptable place to start.

What About Strapless Dildos?

A strapless dildo is a different proposition.

Usually U-shaped, one end sits inside the giving partner while the longer end is used to penetrate their partner. This can create wonderfully close, connected partner play without wearing a harness.

But despite the name, a strapless dildo doesn't necessarily stay put entirely by itself. They generally suit rocking, grinding and more controlled movement better than vigorous thrusting.

If maximum stability and freedom of movement are priorities, you may prefer a traditional dildo and harness.

What Is a Double-Ended Dildo?

A double-ended dildo has a penetrative section at both ends, allowing two partners to enjoy penetration simultaneously.

They come in different lengths, widths, materials and degrees of flexibility, so think about both partners' preferences when choosing one. What feels deliciously full for one person may be too much for the other.

Traditional double dildos and strapless dildos aren't quite the same thing, either. If you're deciding between them, our Double Dildo Guide explains how each works and which styles suit different kinds of partner play.

Can I Use a Dildo Anally?

Yes - provided the dildo is designed for safe anal use.

Because the anus can draw objects further inside, an anal dildo needs a sufficiently wide flared base, handle or other secure stopper.

Start slowly, use plenty of anal lube, and remember that firmer materials such as glass and metal can feel more intense because they don't flex with the body.

If anal pleasure is your priority, start with our Anal Dildos collection rather than assuming any dildo is suitable.

Choosing a Dildo Is Personal

We can give you measurements, explain materials and talk you through every curve, ripple and feature — but only you know what feels right for your body.

Your first dildo doesn't need to be the biggest, most expensive or most technically impressive one. And it certainly doesn't need to resemble what you've seen in porn.

Choose according to the pleasure you already enjoy or the sensations you're curious to explore.

Your body. Your pleasure. Your choice.

And if your first dildo teaches you that next time you'd like something slimmer, firmer, curvier, heavier or gloriously more ample? Perfect. That's useful information too.