Dear Sh! My partner wants me to be louder and more vocal in the bedroom. I think this is a bit embarrassing - I don't want anyone to hear! I feel a bit shy about it, but I'm willing to give it a go. But - where do I start?
Hi there,
Thanks for getting in touch!
This isn't as uncommon as you might think. Most people get turned on by hearing their partner enjoying themselves.
Like sight, the sound is a sense that can instantly stir the sexual imagination. Just like watching some hot action, listening to the sounds of pleasure tends to get the juices flowing. But while the visual can be enjoyed quietly behind a locked door, being vocal can feel intimidating. What if the neighbours hear?
Being loud during sex is liberating!
The aim is to tune into being vocal during sex, so it’s no good trying to mask your moaning with thumping music. Do whatever is necessary for you to feel free to be as vocal as you can and enjoy the liberation of letting rip:
- Soundproof the windows
- Say "to hell with eavesdroppers"
- Get a hotel room
Being vocal during sex means ensuring that you breathe, pant, moan, talk, whisper, and scream... A common cause of elusive orgasms for some women is simply an unconscious holding of breath which stops the body from letting go.
Your voice doesn't need to be at full volume to steam up the windows. The sounds of arousal naturally mirror physical pleasure, which means that the more you feel, the more vocal you'll feel. A circle of orgasmic pleasure! Even if you are shy, try to express yourself as if your body is in heaven. If you're with a lover, they'll take vocal sex as a huge compliment.
Why not make your own spicy soundtrack by recording your next sex session? (If you’re with your partner, ask their permission first.) Even if you consciously feel a little shy listening to yourself being vocal during sex, your sexual imagination certainly won't be. Your very own version of Horny Hits Vol 1 is likely to get you going all over again!
Practice being vocal during sex
Try this: Start by seductively blindfolding your lover and then sidle up close and murmur your deepest, darkest fantasy into their ear. Whispering sounds naturally sexy as your voice is lower and breathy. It’s amazing how liberating and un-inhibiting not being watched can be when trying to be vocal during sex.
We hope this helps!
Best Wishes,
Team Sh! xx
