Right from the start (poor sex education at school), we're taught that no sexual encounter is complete without one erect body part (penis) going into an orifice (vagina). A certain amount of preliminary touching and teasing is all good, but the penetration matters. Without penetration, it's not "real sex."
We call BS.
You and your partner can have fantastic sex without any form of penetration. In fact, breaking the penetration routine is a great way to open up conversations and minds to new sensations and ultimately spice things up!
Go back to basics
With busy schedules and working lives to contend with, many of us rush through sexy time and forget about the highly erotic play that is taking place. Any intimate scenario is about people coming together and enjoying one another.
Instead of having humpin’ bumpin’ sex, go back to basics and re-learn how erotic touch can be. How much do you know about erogenous zones? Take time to reacquaint yourself with your own but also, spend an evening exploring your lover's hot spots...
Top Tip: Using your mouth, start at the top and work your way down. Add more heat by placing an ice cube in your mouth. This increases sensations for your partner, and they'll tune in to each sensually cool drip on their naked skin.
Erotic massage
A massage is a super-intimate act because it means paying close attention to another’s body.
Ask your partner where they’d most like massaged, so you can avoid touching any body parts they’re uncomfortable with.
- Make sure the room is warm.
- Prepare the area with towels, cushions, and massage oils.
- Dim the lights or light candles.
- Lay them down diagonally on the bed or cushions on the floor.
- Turn off phones.
Need some tips on how to give an erotic massage? We have a blog post right here!
Top Tip: Massage candles are sensual and decacent for massages. They burn at a lower temperature which making them safe for dripping onto naked skin.
The power of words
It’s crazy how sexy talking is overlooked in the bedroom, especially since it’s a massive turn-on for so many of us. It is a great way to learn more about your partner and what they like.
Lay down on the bed next to each other, without touching. Instead, talk about what you would like to happen the next time you play. You could even reminisce about past (shared) sexual experiences. Either way, talking about sex and sharing fantasies is a surefire way to get the juices flowing...
Sexting with a lover is also a fantastic way to build arousal. Sending each other messages about what you did last time or what you'd like to do next time is hot, babes. HOT!
