Dear Sh!
After having my children, I've lost confidence in the bedroom. So I’ve been with my partner for over a decade but, after having two young kids (now aged 7 and 4), our sex life has seemed a bit strained.
We don’t have that much time and I feel like I’ve lost a bit of confidence what with my body changing.
Our anniversary is coming up soon, and I'd like to treat my partner to something really sexy that will make me feel good too - maybe stripping? - but I don't know where I'd even start.
I feel like the only thing hot about it will end up being my cheeks after I've died of embarrassment. If you have any tips on how to absolutely nail a striptease, please share!
Hi, thanks for getting in touch!
The first rule of nailing a striptease is feeling sexy within yourself. Stripping could be a great way to rediscover what you love about your body and your sexuality.
Here's how to strip off with confidence:
Showers are brilliant places for exploring your body. You'll need about 15 minutes, so give yourself some extra me-time in the bathroom.
Give yourself a couple of minutes to relax under the warm water. Once you feel ready, start moving your hands around your body. Get some body wash in the mix and lather up. Your skin will be sensually soft, and your hands glide over curves. Think about what feels nice, not what looks nice.
The next step is to start humming one of your favourite feeling-sexy songs and encourage your hips to follow suit, twisting or swaying side-to-side. If you have one of those nifty waterproof shower speakers, turn it up and get moving...
PRACTICE YOUR STRIPTEASE SHIMMIES
Once you get into the swing of it, teasingly glide your hands down your neck, torso and thighs whilst swaying your hips.
Good posture is essential for staying in control. Try keeping your spine straight and shoulders relaxed. If your shoulders feel hunched, lift them up to your ears on an inhale, then exhale while moving them backwards and sliding down your back. Keep those hips swaying in time with the music.
It's time to practice in the bedroom once you feel good about yourself in the bathroom. This works best when home alone, but consider where you want your partner to be for the actual striptease. Do you want your lover to sit on the bed, taken by surprise? Tied to a chair? Sprawled on the bed, eyes open, and jaw hanging wide open?
It’s good to plan the logistics beforehand. This way, you know where sharp corners are, so you can avoid accidentally stubbing a toe during your sexy performance (the number one mood-killer of a striptease).
Once you have your position and hip motion, you need to work out if you’ll be moving from A to B. Are you entering from another room to sexily saunter over? Is there a door frame you can slide down? Have you got feathers to tickle them with if tied up?
YOUR STRIPTEASE OUTFIT
We believe that a good striptease starts fully clothed and a fair distance away from your subject. You could set a little rule for yourself - the closer you get to your partner, the more naked you get…
It helps if they're happy to be handcuffed or tied to a piece of furniture. This means they can't touch, giving you opportunities for teasing and tempting.
You can't go wrong with a femme fatale look involving stockings and suspenders. Make sure to slip on your panties on top of the suspenders traps, or you'll have a helluva time trying to get 'em off while still looking like a temptress… Whatever you choose, layer it on so you can slip out of it piece by piece.
Finally, you need some fun extras because, at some point, your striptease will turn into a live sex show (exciting!).
Have your favourite sex toys nearby, along with some lube. You could store a little surprise under the top of your suspenders (condoms, a tiny bottle of lube or a bullet vibrator. Then hook up your leg onto a chair or table and draw it out whilst they watch.
Crave Vesper necklace vibe is a classic for accessorizing Bond-style. Or, if you have them sitting on a comfy seat, think about sexy textures to tease them with. A pinwheel looks dangerous but feels sensual, and popping body mousse is so much fun!
The beauty of a striptease is that it can be as easy-peasy or as inventive as you like. You know your partner and yourself better than anyone else, so feel assured with that knowledge. The most important aspect is how you feel when you are doing it or about the prospect of doing it. Your striptease should be fun, confidence-boosting and sexy!
Have fun!
Love,
Team Sh! xx