Bondage and kink can sound pretty daunting, especially if you’re not one to throw caution to the wind and jump into the unknown, (tethered) feet first!
By definition, bondage is the act of consensually tying, binding or restraining a partner for 'erotic, aesthetic, or somatosensory stimulation'
That all sounds quite cold and complicated but in reality to submit to your partner's desire, or take full control over your partner's pleasure can be incrediblty *hot* and not as scary as it first might appear.
We have some tips and tricks, so read on for our advice on the best way to introduce bondage into your bedroom.
How to talk about bondage with your partner?
When it comes to sexual excitement, the element of surprise can often work wonders, but this isn’t always the case when it comes to bondage.
Being tied up can, for some people, result in claustrophobia and panic. It can trigger. So never just whip out the bondage tape - it's crucial to discuss beforehand and get active consent before you get started.
Have an open discussion where you talk through your desires with them - take inspiration from introducing sex toys (which, of course bondage gear is!) and share what it is about bondage that excites you, and how you imagine the two of you enjoying it together. Ask how they would feel about trying out bondage with you...
Start small and build up to bondage
There are so many fun items available for you to practice bondage, but it’s best to go slowly and build yourself up to the more advanced products over time.
For newbies, we recommend keeping it simple with a beautiful satin blindfold. This will introduce you both to sensory play to help to build excitement, which is likely to encourage you and your partner to continue your adventurous journey.
Restricting someone’s vision causes all their other senses to be on high alert, and every touch, lick and kiss will be felt much more intensely.
Bondage safety: Playing safely with BDSM means always using a safeword, and honouring it absolutely. If one partner safewords, play must stop immediately.
Avoid knot ties
Bondage rope that can be tied into fancy knots is popular with experienced kinksters but isn't a good choice for those just starting out.
Instead, why not try Quickie Cuffs, which are simple but super-effective? Quickie cuffs are easy-peasy to slip on and off, but let you experience the feeling of being restrained safely. They're made from body-friendly silicone and don’t require keys or locks.
Bondage tape is tape that sticks to itself, but not to skin. It's easy to use, looks kinky when wrapped around wrists or ankles and with 20 meters per roll there's plenty to lash wrists/ankles to bed posts too!
Whatever your choice of wrist cuffs or other types of restraints, always make sure to have medical scissors within reach. Should the restrained partner panic unexpectedly (and this can happen), you want to be able to release them quick-sharp.
Bondage safety: Never leave a restrained person alone in a room. They are uttly in your care and you should never leave them, even for a second.
Bondage collar for play
It can feel awkward or difficult to shake off outside roles of responsibility and step into the role of sexy Dominant or submissive. Using a bondage collar for your play session is a fun way to transition into your D/s personas. When the collar comes out, it's time to play!
For the time the collar is worn, the pre-agreed roles are observed. Once play finishes, and the collar is removed, the usual power balance is restored between you both.
Bondage safety: Make sure you can fit one or two fingers in-between the collar and the skin.
Keep communication going
When it comes to sex, honesty is always the best policy. If you feel uncomfortable about something, be sure to let your partner know. And, if the roles are reversed, make sure to take their concerns seriously. Failing to listen can ensure they won't want to explore bondage with you again.
Equally, if you really enjoy something, being vocal is a great way to heighten pleasure and excitement for both yourself and your partner. Remember, power-play sex is meant to be enjoyable, so relax, let go and see where your adventure takes you.
Bondage safety: Aftercare is just as important as any prep before your play session. Plan for down-time afterwards, where you are out of your personas - this is time to sit down, cuddle and talk about how you felt exploring bondage together.
